I'm looking at the clock, and it's 2:30am; shit if my veins aren't saturated in CoffeeMate at this point. I'm always compelled to write when it's late; maybe it's the fact that I feel like the world is mine; or maybe because I feel slightly delusional past 11pm; sober on a drunk idea of some sort.
Shit, for the longest time I sacrificed who I was for this picture perfect, clean cut image of some person I wasn't. I'm not saying I'm some wild child with a hell-burning streak in my soul, but I'll be the first to admit that my life, and who I am, isn't all sugar and daisies; that my soul, and yours too, is a wild mix of hellfire and holy water. Don't get caught up on the idea that you can't be who you really are for the sake of acceptance; for the fear that you'll be misunderstood. For a longtime, I felt like I had to be all of one idea or image; or not at all. Picture perfect, clean cut, fits it to a T, easy to accept..I started this shop a year and a half ago. And it's now just getting started. I got wrapped up in "portraying" my ideal best self, when I should've been representing my soul the whole time. Shit if I'll ever be the girl that I think I should be, or do all of the things right in life or achieve this or that. But I do know that I can be the girl that I am right now; to love her, to live for her and to be true to her spirit. None of us are perfect. Believe me when I say I've done a lot of things wrong in my life; but I can say that staying true to who I really am has been the best "image.".You can be sweet and powerful without sacrificing the other; both honey and wildfire are the color of gold.